You Talk Way Too Much
by VisionOfDivision
Summary: And I always feared that I'd have a crush on my roommate, but I never thought of the possibility of having a crush on a girl on my floor.
1. Until Next Time

And I always feared that I'd have a crush on my roommate, but I never thought of the possibility of having a crush on a girl on my floor.

I never noticed her much for the first few days of school, while everybody was lugging their shit in and parents were walking up and down the hallway. I never noticed the sound of her voice when we were going around introducing ourselves on the first day. I never noticed that in vanity, she was amazing and that I'd be in awe. I do, however remember liking her jacket and thinking that light patter in my head was my gaydar going off, neither of which I really gave too much thought too.

But, I remember the first day that I noticed her, and there was really no turning back.

"I just think that if I met a girl who liked The Strokes as much as I do, who happened to be hot, we'd be in love."

"Because The Strokes is thee only personality trait. Right, Ash?"

"Well, I mean there's boobs...and gotta have that smile, blonde hair's pretty necessary..."

"You're from Los Angeles! Go out of your realm a little bit."

"I am! I don't want California blonde, I just want...different blonde. But I'm saying, if she likes the strokes I'm in love."

"There are plenty of girls who like the strokes, I assure you."

I looked my relatively new friend up and down, we'd only been friends for a couple weeks now, though in that time we'd gotten pretty close. For University, I'd have to say that Abby was probably my best friend here, and the only one who knew I was gay.

"Never the right ones!"

"You're too much, Ashley. Seriously. Lower your standards."

"Never!" I shouted walking towards the door, "Dinner at 6?"

"Yes!"

"Sounds good!"

I swung my keys on my wrist as I made my way back to my room, going down the stairs to my hallway and immediately the thumping of loud music filled my ears. I slowly started to walk down my hall to figure out which door it was coming from when an open door hit me, music blasting out.

"I know you hate to be impressed with someone else (other than yourself). But you know, trying to hold back on being an asshole helps. Fear of sleep. Fear of sleep."

Low and behold it was The Strokes blasting from a room of a girl on my floor, though not counting my blessings yet, I hadn't seen what she looked like. I peered in to compliment my mystery woman when the cliché moment happened. She sat perched on her chair leaning over to her desk with her legs crossed underneath her intently reading the text on her screen of her macbook.

"Great music!" I shouted. No answer. I stood there awkwardly, because who expected her to be beautiful, "I can't believe you like the strokes!"

"Huh?" she turned to me, greeting me with the most beautiful face.

"The Strokes. I love them they're my favourite band."

"Oh yeah? They are pretty great. I love them."

"I have all their cds," I bragged nonchalantly, trying to impress her.

"Me too. I have these bizarre demos as well, and these offbeat recordings of Julian talking and singing songs that aren't even on their cds."

"What?"

"I have-,"

"No, I know, I'm just amazed. You are officially amazing."

"Yeah, it's cool."

Or not.

"What else do you like?"

"I really like The Hives."

"Yeah, they're good," I lied, not having listened to them much in my life time, side noting to download them first chance I got, "Cool! Well, I just wanted to let you know that you had good band choice."

"Thanks," she replied apathetically and turned back to her computer.

Or she could just be a total bitch. That could be the kicker too.

"Or she could not be gay," Abby replied after taking a bite of her burger.

"But she's so pretty."

Cue Abby's are you fucking kidding me face, "So?"

"I'm just saying it'd be nice!" I whined.

"And I'd like an unlimited supply of Brie cheese, but that's not happening is it?"

"You're an ass."

"I'm realistic. Speaking of which, are you going to tell Sam you're gay?"

Sam would be my roommate, who luckily, I get along very well with and have developed quite the friendship. I know she's gay friendly and all...but changing in front of a girl who's gay, that's a different story, which kind of makes me nervous.

"I will."

"As soon as hell freezes over."

"I will!"

She got up to clear her tray, and I followed, "It's like taking off a bandaid. Just do it. Fast. And get it over with."

"That's what she said!" I giggled.

Her face scrunched perplexed, "What ever girl says that seriously has issues and is going to make a horrible girlfriend."

I frowned, "I thought it was funny."

She laughed and shook her head, "Oh, Ashley. What are we going to do with you?"

"I do not know. Class at 9am tomorrow. Shoot me now please."

"Not so bad!"

"Says the girl who starts at 10."

"What's an hour?"

"An hour more of sleep, duh."

She shook her head again, "You're too much.

And I think she became known as the girl with the loud music, because I couldn't remember her name in the beginning, and every time I walked past, her room was pounding.

"And then you take that love you made, and stick it into some, someone else's heart. Pumping someone else's blood. And walking arm and arm. You hope it don't get harmed. But even if it does you'll just do it all again."

"Oh my god you like Regina Spektor too."

She turned to me a little suddenly, as if I startled her, "Yeah I love her."

"You're not only playing Regina Spektor you're basically playing my favourite song by her."

She gave me a smirk without teeth, shrugged her head in a what can I say fashion and responded with, "It's a good song."

"Wow. Well, your music taste is just blowing me out of the water."

"Glad you approve."

It was as if conversation wasn't her forte, or maybe she just didn't like me. Didn't like me? She didn't even know me.

"Dude, that girl two doors away from us has the best music taste!"

"It's really loud."

"She likes the The Strokes!"

Sam laughed at my awkward eccentricities, "Maybe you two should get married!"

I laughed nervously, "Ah, yes. Definitely...married...I forgot that was legal here."

"When in Canada..."

"Do as the Canadians do...must marry a woman then..."

She laughed, "If you so desire."

"I don't think that girl likes me very much..."

She shrugged, "Her loss."

I could always count on Sam to back me up. We'd become pretty instant friends as well and it was safe to say her and Abby had become my go to's.

"Frat party tonight!" somebody in my hall shouted.

"Let's go!" another girl hollered.

"You girls going?" the girl next to us, Kelly, asked.

"I don't know. I've been her for two weeks already orienting myself in the international students program. I've already done a lot of partying..."

"But you haven't been to a frat party and you haven't partied with us. Come on!"

I turned to Sam who nodded, "Okay, I guess we're down."

It seemed our whole floor was going, like it was a consensus we all had to go together for the first frat party of the year. We met up at the first floor lobby near the entrance where I saw the rest of my floor in a group talking.

"So I haven't really eaten today and I was kind of hungry, so I brought sour patch kids," strokes girl said holding a bag of sour patch kids.

"Sour patch kids are always a good choice," I encouraged.

She looked at me and then turned to the blonde girl next to her, who I later found was Nicole, and kept talking. Or this girl didn't like me for whatever reason.

"Spencer, can I have one?"

"Knock yourself out girlfriend," she handed the bag of sour patch kids to Nicole.

Spencer. Spencer. Interesting. She stood there surveying, and as she saw Sam's boots this seemed to please her, "Thank god you're wearing boots. I feel like a giant in mine!"

"Me too..."

"We can both be giants," she assured Sam.

"It doesn't matter if you're giants, boots are always hot," I smiled.

She looked at me again, in assessment and nodded as she continued to talk with her friends.

I guess I wouldn't try to be here friend after all.


	2. Don't Be Shy

"What do I wear to a Canucks game?"

"Clothes?"

"But, like, what are the colours?"

"Green, blue, white, wear something with any of those colours and you'll be fine," a girl on my floor assured me.

I walked back out of my room a flew minutes later, "This okay?"

She eyed my top, which was blue, green and grey striped and nodded, "I'd say you're good to go," she smiled.

"Thanks. I hear Canucks fans can get a bit rowdy."

"Oh, they can. We take our hockey very seriously, here."

I walked back into my room to put a jacket on, grabbed my purse and headed out and I began talking to Sarah again.

"Have you ever been to a hockey game? Even for your home team?"

"No..."

She laughed again, "You are in for a treat, let me tell you."

As I stood there talking I saw Spencer walk by with a couple girls on our floor, wearing a sundress. She looked so pretty, and I really liked her dress. She turned around just as she passed me, "I like your outfit."

My face scrunched in confusion, "Uh...thanks?" I looked down at myself, grey jeans, blue, green and grey striped shirt, grey toms and a light blue denim jacket. Seemed pretty simple.

Sensing my confusion she went on further, "I guess I've just never seen you wearing jeans before."

"I wear jeans weekly."

"Well...maybe it's just because I always see you in sweats since when you're on the floor that's what you wear."

I shrugged, "I like to be comfy if I'm not going anywhere," which was the antithesis of Spencer, who always looked like she had an event to go to, even if it was sitting in her room all day. She made it look easy to look that good all the time.

"Well, I like the outfit anyway. Have fun at your game."

I couldn't stop thinking about Spencer the whole time as we walked to the hockey game and while Kristi and Abby talked I kind of silently pondered, because I over think everything. It was just a compliment...a weird one. Maybe she's not good at giving compliments.

"I can't believe my team is losing."

"It's like...your past against your present!" Abby shouted excitedly, not even looking over at me, cheering.

"It is isn't it?"

"This is so intense."

We followed the mass out of the stadium and made out way to the door, "Oh no."

"What?" Kristi asked.

"I believe it's raining..."

"Shit. I knew I should have worn something more than a cardigan."

"I don't think any of us are prepared for this."

"A bus!" Abby shouted.

I ran for it going in front of the parked bus along the curb and running around to the door as it opened for me, accompanied by a firm talking to.

"Never run in front of a bus!" the bus driver yelled at me, as my friends silently snuck by me, not wanting to have anything to do with this.

"Okay."

"I mean, if I had gone you could have been killed."

"Yeah." I said starting to get a little irritated.

"I mean that could have been the end of you! And it would have been on me!"

"Okay! Thank you." I snapped as made my way to the back of the bus and shook my head.

"Ashley Davies. You are the only person I know who runs in front of a bus," Kristi told me laughing.

"It was parked! Come on!"

"That was so funny," Abby laughed, "That could have been the end of you," she mocked.

I laughed, "Whatever. Dumb bitch. He's just upset because he's stuck driving a bus for a living."

She shrugged, "I'd be too."

After getting off at the bus loop, we still had to walk all the way back to our rooms. Did I ever mention how horrible toms are when wet. I mean they're just cloth.

"My toms are soaked," I frowned, staring down at them while we waited at a red light.

"Put newspaper in them. Absorbs the water like crazy."

"Really?"

"Yup," Kristi smiled.

"Huh. I'll have to pick some up in the commons."

We made our way back to residence, completely drenched and it was midnight and normally I'd never retire that early but I was kind of beat. I made my way back to my room, put on some basketball shorts and my oversized sweatshirt that my best friend gave me before I left so that I'd think of him. It always made me feel comfortable. Desperate to have a good night's sleep for once, I scrounged my room for some weed, and much to my dismay we had none, "Fuck."

I picked up my pipe and examined it, "That's a good amount of resin," I meticulously scraped away, making a good resin bowl for myself, stood up on my chair and smoked out my window. It was a common thing, nobody ever got caught for smoking in their room, Spencer kind of started it. She's kind of a pot head.

I sat on my bed complacently baked, resin always did that to me, when I heard a loud ringing of a smoke detector. What the fuck? I ran out of my room to survey the hall way and I saw a bunch of people running out of the hallway and then there she was.

I saw Spencer running back down the hallway towards her room. Her eyes flicked up at me as she headed towards her room, "Is that yours?"

"Yeah," she rushed out, "Can you help me?"

I shrugged, and walked over to her as she unlocked her room, "Whoa it reeks in here."

She looked at me paniced, "Shut the door!" and I did what she said.

"Okay...what do I do?" she asked as she moved her desk chair underneath the smoke detector and hopped up onto it.

"Uh..."

She looked down at me, "Are you high?"

"Possibly."

"Fuck. Okay. Okay, we can do this."

I just stood there looking up at her as the smoke detector kept ringing and she fussed with it, "I'm going to cut it."

"No! You'll electrocute yourself!"

"I don't even care!" she pulled the plastic off and stretched it so the wires were showing and then reached for razor cutter knife. I stepped back, not liking this idea as she cut it and the room flashed like lighting hit and made a loud popping noise to which I screamed slightly. Yeah, it scared me. She did it again and it pushed her back a little bit. She climbed down from the chair and the fire detector dropped and began to beep again, "Fuck batteries!" she cursed, as she put the smoke detector under her pillow and sat on it for a few seconds. I laughed. It was just too funny.

"Sorry for laughing," I giggled out.

She looked at me with a relatively pissed off expression. Great. I blew it, "I have to go. Bye."

She ran out of the hallway and I slowly made my way back to my room. That was the most interesting Friday night I have had in a long while. I had to text Abby.

"Wow. That's crazy."

"You have to see this girl. She's so hot."

"Next time I come over point her out."

"Yeah, okay."

Sam was gone this weekend so I kind of had the room to myself, except for friends constantly over. I'd just gotten ready the next morning as I was walking down the hall back to my room when I heard my name.

"Ashley!"

I turned around to see Spencer walking down the hall way with stuff in her hand. I didn't even know she knew my name, "I got stuff to fix my smoke detector," she smiled.

This girl was strange. Now she smiles? I laughed, "Oh yeah, last night."

She made her way to her down to her room which is about where I was in the hallway, "Can you come in with me while I do it? I feel like you're my partner in crime with this thing, like we're bonded now."

I shrugged, "Sure."

She stood up on her chair taping it and fussing with it, I'm not sure what she was doing to be honest, "There."

"Won't they know eventually when it doesn't work?"

"We'll worry about that when that gets closer."

There was a knock at the door, and then an opening. It was Nicole. I'd never really talked to her either, "Hallo!" she said in a funky tone.

"Halloooo," Spencer responded.

I'd never really seen her interact. She was always just kind of non conversational, "Ashley's here with me while I fix my smoke detector."

"God, it was so crazy last night," I shook my head.

"So I heard. I heard you were like no help," Nicola laughed.

Spencer looked down at her and gave her a look I couldn't exactly decipher, "You were fine," she told me.

"I was stoned! And what was I supposed to do. It's not like both of us could climb on that chair."

"Hey, bro, no need to get defensive. I'm just messing with you."

I nodded okay and smiled, "Well, I'm glad your thing is fixed."

"Thanks for your help!" she smiled, non sarcastically.

I laughed, "What help?" and left her room.

Maybe she's just shy at first.


	3. She's Got Something to Say

Sorry this chapter's kind of short...but I don't want it to be forcedly stretched out. Enjoy.

~ . ~

We'd learned that smoking in our room was okay, provided you use a filter and keep an incense going, and it beat going outside as October started getting pretty cold. I used any excuse to talk to Spencer, as we'd occasionally chat.

"Hey can I have an incense? We're out."

She eyed me knowingly, "Gonna do a little something something?"

I laughed, "Possibly."

She smiled mischievously, "Well, here you go miss. Enjoy."

Was it weird that it kind of turned me on that she was an all knowing sexy pothead? Who had good taste in music and dressed classy? I was just way too into this person who intrigued me.

I walked back to our room holding up the incense stick, "Got some."

Before we had a chance to set up, Kelly, our next door neighbor, walked up to our door. We'd never talked much nor socialized with her but I had nothing against her either.

"Did I hear you guys were going to smoke?"

We looked around to see that nobody was around, "Yes we are."

"Care if I join? I have a little left."

"Sure."

We set up on the middle of our floor, opened the windows, lit the incense and sat down. We started our smoke circle and in no time we were blazing.

"So. Baked," Kelly let out, and laughed a little bit

I smiled, "I can't feel my toes."

"Let's go make macaroni!" Sam suggested.

"Down." we both agreed in unison.

We made our way to the lounge to find Nicole and Spencer in there watching tv.

"You guys smell beautiful," Spencer noted, eyeing my zoned out expression that was always on my face whenever I was high.

We all laughed and began making our macaroni.

"Fill the boiler up all the way."

"It's going to overflow."

"No, it won't," Sam argued.

We waited impatiently for 8 years as the water got hot enough to boil.

"Dude, it's boiling over!" Kelly shouted.

"Oh, fuck it is!" I agreed.

"Unplug it," Sam stressed rather urgently.

"Oh...yeah," I walked over to it and unplugged it.

"You guys are too cute," Spencer smiled, turning away from the tv.

I smiled dumbly and handed the boiler to Sam, who then gave it to Kelly and she made us macaroni. We'd finished making it and decided to head out and enjoy our snack in our room.

"Thanks for the incense!" I shouted out as we left.

"Any time!"

And I don't know if Spencer and I were even friends but she'd become not much of a bitch to me anymore. I don't know if it's because I stopped ignoring her and she liked that but, the more I didn't care, the more it seemed her concern grew.

I was walking back to my room after Spanish, and her door was open. It was always open, with some form of good music filtering out.

"Ey girlfran!" I heard as I walked by, going to my room, not thinking anything of it as I kept walking.

"Fine Ashley! Don't say hi!" I heard shouted.

I laughed and walked back, "What?"

She put on a pout, "I said hi and you didn't say hi back."

"Oh you were talking to me?"

She laughed like I was unbelievable, "I don't see anyone else here. Do you?"

"I just assumed you were skyping somebody or something. I don't know."

"Nope. You."

I stretched casually and in a jokingly not caring voice responded, "Actually, Spencer I'm just too cool for you. You're not special enough."

She frowned, going along with my joking, "I knew it."

"It's hard to be up at my level."

She laughed, "I'm sure."

Her laughter was contagious because I always felt the need to laugh with her, "Bye Spencer."

I smiled the whole way back to my room. Maybe we'd be friends. Maybe we'd get to know each other.

It was funny because it was already the end of September and Sam didn't know. I'd mentioned ex's names and said they were friends and mentioned relationships passed and never referred to them as boyfriends and she'd asked me if I was gay once and I said no. I actually said no. I'd never been good at admitting I was gay.

"Sam, there's a spider."

She looked up from her notebook, "Okay."

"I want to go to sleep," I whined.

"So kill it."

"Can you do it for me?"

"Ew. I'm not touching it."

"You'd be upset too if it was on your side!" I complained shifting my weight from one foot to the other looking up at it.

She laughed, "Doesn't Delia do it all the time?"

"Oh yeah!" I screeched running down to Delia's room, knocking and receiving no answer.

I saw Nicole and Spencer watching tv again in the lounge, "Have you guys seen Delia?"

"Nope. I think she's out," Spencer deadpanned.

"Are either of you afraid of spiders?"

"Yeah, why?" Spencer asked.

"Cause there's one on my wall and I want it dead..."

She laughed, "I'll get it for you. I don't like them but I can still kill them."

I smiled brightly, "Yes!"

"But not until big bang theory's over."

I groaned, "Oh my god..."

"Just sit down and watch it with us and I'll take care of your spider afterwards. You might as well not go back to your room right now."

I mumbled some inaudible curses through my breath and sat down, forced to watch big bang theory.

I'd never seen the show much, but I didn't really ever watch tv so that wasn't surprising. I kind of enjoyed it.

Tanisha, another girl on our floor who was probably considered Spencer's other best friend, walked into our lounge, "Do either of you have an extra pillow I can borrow?"

"Yeah, sure," Spencer got up to go to her room, and brought back a pillow for Tanisha and smiled.

It kind of irritated me because all I wanted to do was go to bed and I had to sit here until the show was over to have her kill some stupid spider that would take like...a minute, and she went to go get her friend a pillow. It wasn't even a commercial break. I think I even showed a little frustration but it went unnoticed. The show ended and she just sat there, not bringing up killing my spider, so then I brought it up, "Uh...my spider?"

"Oh yeah. Let's do this."

She followed me to my room and entered, never having been in it before, it was evident she was surveying, "I like your comforter." Would you like to be on it? Sorry. Dirty thoughts couldn't escape my mind.

"Where is it?"

I pointed to it up on the wall above my bed and she looked at it mockingly, "That's it?"

"Yes."

"That's nothing," she climbed on my desk chair, "Tissue?"

I handed her one and she grabbed it immediately, "Don't throw it away in here."

She laughed, "I won't. I feel kind of like a BAMF though. Like a hero."

"Well, I would have had Delia do it if she was here cause she's good at this stuff."

She looked down at me with another look I couldn't decipher, "Well, good thing I was here."

She walked it back into the lounge to throw it away and I followed her. I don't know. To say thanks.

"Thanks."

"Not a problem, girlfriend."

I looked up at the tv, "Simpsons!"

"Yep."

"I love this show!"

I sat down to watch it and she sat down to on an opposite couch and we just sat there watching. Nicole had left and pretty soon it was just us too, which made me uncomfortable.

Sam came shuffling in, "There you are."

"Shh. Simpsons."

She sat down next to me and so I turned to the side with my back to one end of the couch stretching my legs across. I wouldn't look at Spencer because it made me nervous but I could see her glance over out of the corner of my eye and if I didn't know better she was staring at my legs. And every time I'd laugh at something stupid Homer said she'd look over at me and smile. I don't know why. Maybe in appreciation that I got the humor. But I'd seen these episodes before so I knew it was coming and I'd continue to laugh as I'd anticipate the funny parts and she'd smile every time I'd buckle over at something abnormally hilarious. Sometimes I'd laugh a little too loud and she'd look over at me. I started to get self conscious that maybe she thought my constant laughing was annoying. It was funny. I'd always had an appreciation for Matt Groening's humor. She'd kind of chuckle sometimes at funny parts but nowhere like me. I laughed at everything.

"Well, I really need to go to bed now."

"Yeah. Me too," Sam agreed.

"Night ladies," Spencer responded, turning off the tv and exiting towards her room as well.


	4. You're Wondering Now

Thanks so much for all the reviews guys :) I'm really glad you guys like the story. Yes, there is another story I had going on...maybe I'll finish it. I'm really bad at endings but love beginnings. Sorry if it seems chunked around, but this is based off of a true story so I'm trying to kind of get to those moments. Anyway, here you go. Enjoyyy.

Spencer always had these 'happening' parties in her room. I guess you could say many people knew who she was. I think it's just that she kind of didn't care and did what she wanted, and people admired that. I admired that. She always invited me and I'd nod like yeah sure, but then I'd never go. I don't know why. I'm not a shy person by any means but being around her made me self conscious and I felt like that wasn't exactly the party environment that I wanted to be in-being unsure of myself and all.

She walked by, "Whatever scent you have burning in here smells amazing."

I looked down at her from my bed, "Lotus."

She closed her eyes, "Mmm, It smells delicious. Keep it going."

I smiled at her approval, "Will do."

"Oh. I'm having a party in my room tonight. You guys," she looked at me, "Should definitely come."

Sam nodded excitedly, "Definitely."

Spencer walked out and I gave Sam a what the hell look, "Abby's coming over for movie's, doofus."

"Come on, Ash. We never go to her parties."

"So?"

"She always invites you."

"So?"

"Be nice and go."

"I'm not going."

"Why not?"

"Because there are reasons that I just don't want to go."

Sam, knowing she couldn't push me to spill gave and began getting ready, deciding that she'd go herself. Downing a bunch of vodka in preparation as she made her way over to join the fantastic party, Abby and I watched movies. I know. It was kind of lame for a Friday night, but I refused to go to her party. I didn't want to see her flirting with all these guys and kissing guys and doing things to her that I couldn't do. Things that I so badly wanted to do.

"You have to tell Sam eventually."

"I'm going to."

"It's October."

"I know..."

We continued to watch movies until Abby decided to leave, and Spencer's party began to move. Sam was too drunk and so I followed her up to the first floor.

"Sam, let's go back to the room."

"I'm good. In a few."

I nodded, looking around for Spencer. She was talking to Tanisha and Chris, smoking a cigarette and I couldn't help but stare. Even in complete drunkeness she was beautiful. Even with a cigarette in her mouth.

"Ash, you okay?" Sam asked me through a moment of clarity.

"Yeah! I'm good."

"I'm tired."

I pulled out my blackberry, "It's 1:48. Let's get you home soldier," we got back into our room and we changed, getting ready for bed, "How was the party?"

"Some guy stuck his tongue down my throat."

"Ew."

"Yeah. I was not pleased. Are you going to tell me why you didn't want to go now?"

"You're drunk."

"I'm sobering up," she told me seriously.

"It's nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing, Ash."

And I hated how she knew me so well, "It's Spencer."

"What about Spencer?"

"She's really cool."

She laughed, "Okay."

"So, it's just kind of hard cause she's so cool and I like that she's so cool..."

"I'm not following."

"I like her."

"Okay...," she searched.

"A lot."

"Uh huh..."

"As more than a friend," I finished.

"But, I thought you said you weren't gay," she questioned.

"I lied."

"Why? You knew I had no problem with gay people. Half my friends are gay. Why? Would have you been lying to me for almost two months?"

"Well, I knew you'd be okay with it, but having to change in front of me. I didn't know if you'd be weirded out."

"God Ash," she groaned leaning her head back against her wall, "I have to say I'm a little upset."

I bit my lip nervously. Nervous habit, "You are?"

"Yeah. I'm just...a little sad that you thought you couldn't trust me to love you regardless."

I smiled, "I'm sorry."

She shook her head as in no worries, "But Spencer. Definitely could be gay."

"Right?" I yelled.

She nodded, "I want to know more about your super secret gay life."

We laid in bed for a couple hours talking about stuff. Sam and I were always close but it was like after that moment we'd really bonded. She knew. She knew and I that was all that mattered. And she had to hear about Spencer every day and how beautiful she was how much I liked her. Poor Sam.

Spencer was too much of a wild child. Sometimes I felt like I couldn't even keep up with her or that I wasn't as cool as her. So I'd back up. And she'd say hi. And it was like this cycle that kept going.

I tumbled out of bed, fresh from my nap at 6pm to go get dinner, and on my way back I stopped in the first floor lounge which was our main one where we all congregated and stuff. They were playing mario kart and I'm not a big gamer but I could have my fun.

"Fuck you!" I cussed moving my body with the direction of my player.

"Violent," Kelly noted.

"Damn straight!"

Nicole and Spencer walked in and Spencer sat down next to me, which I wasn't really surprised about anymore, "Your hair looks nice. I like it."

"Uhh...-"GAME OVER, "Shit, what place am I in?"

"Second," Tanisha told me.

"Yesss!"

"So, we're meeting at 8?" Kelly asked.

"Correct," Nicole responded.

"Are you coming to the night market with us?" Spencer asked me.

"I didn't even know about it until just now..."

"You should come."

"Eh...I don't have the money. Sorry," I got up and went back downstairs to my room.

I passed Spencer's room again to go to the bathroom, and her and Kelly were talking.

"Are you sure you can't go?" Spencer asked again. Kelly turned around too, to look at me, Spencer behind her, unable to see her facial expression.

"I-," she started giving me this seductive look and raising her eye brows and then seductively blew me a kiss, grinned and winked, "I mean...I uh...I...I ca-I can't!" I rushed out.

"Oh well," Spencer let out and went deeper into her room.

"She wants me, Sam."

I explained to her the events and Sam sighed, "Spencer seems like trouble."

"Why?"

"Maybe she's just fucking with you."

"No."

"No?"

"She wants me...I think."

I wanted to prove it to Sam, but I figured there really wasn't any way. The next evening we were sitting in our lounge watching tv, with blankets covering us when Spencer came in to rinse a plate.

"You guys look comfy."

"We are," Sam replied.

She talked to us, briefly, making small talk, especially since she hadn't talked to Sam much and her eyes burned into mine. She just kept staring at me and she'd respond to Sam, not moving her gaze once. I wasn't sure if I was imagining it or it was real, "Bye, Spencer," I called out as she was leaving and she waved.

I tried to resume watching tv when Sam turned to me, "Okay she would not take her eyes off of you the whole time."

"Right?"

"Like, okay she'd say something to me but she was fucking fixated on you, like hardcore. Maybe you're right. She seemed pretty intensely into you right there."

"Okay, because I felt that too but I wasn't sure if I was imagining it."

"You were definitely not imagining it."


	5. You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

It's not that I'm skipping a whole month, it's just that nothing really significant happened in November. Spencer invited me to parties every few times and I'd nod in appreciation and not go. I'd still stop by her room in passings. I'm at the point of actually being in her room now and I don't have to stand awkwardly at the doorway. But I kind of kicked my ass in gear with my studies and it was finals time now which meant I had to work especially hard. Spencer didn't. She had ONE final, which magically worked itself to the very end of finals so she had two and a half weeks of sitting around doing nothing. What'd she do? She threw parties.

She whooped it up. I came back from the library with Kelly and Sam to hear the faintest of bass thumping coming from the room that we all knew it was. If it was too loud she'd get points so it couldn't be at it's maximum capacity. As we were walking by we witnessed an odd scene, "Hey guys I'm just going to go put my books in my room and then I'll come over okay?" Kelly was going to come back and hang with us.

We nodded, watching the scene in front of us. The party was bouncing and outside Spencer's door stood Spencer, talking to her friend Taylor. Taylor was kind of a badass lesbian from the 4th floor who hung out with Spencer a lot. They were pretty good friends although I kind of noticed I hadn't seen her as much. Taylor, who was taller than Spencer, leaned nonchalantly against the outside of Spencer's door frame, and Spencer stood on the other side of the door frame with her hand on Taylor's chest as if telling her to stop, eyes glazed over with a watery sheen as if she were about to cry or had been crying. Definitely looked like a couple's dispute.

Kelly showed up right as Sam and I looked at each other. Sam raised an eye brow suspiciously, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I'm pretty sure I am."

"Room. Now. Talk," she walked quickly back to our room and I followed and as soon as we entered our room Sam spoke, "That totally looked like a couples dispute."

"It did!"

"What?" Kelly breathed having ran back to our room, "What is going on!"

Sam looked from me to Kelly and back to me, "Can I tell her?"

I groaned, "Why the fuck not?"

"Okay," Sam turned to Kelly, "Do you think that Spencer could be gay?"

"Oh, she is," she responded casually.

"What!" I yelled, eyes bulging.

"I mean, she won't admit it but she totally is."

I rolled my eyes, "So we don't know."

"Wait, why?"

"Ashley likes her."

"You said you weren't gay dude, what the fuck!" she threw her hands up in irritation.

"I...I'm sorry."

She threw her head back, "Jesus christ finally."

"Huh?"

"I'm so glad we don't have to act like you're not gay anymore. It was so annoying."

"You knew?" I asked.

"Duh. I knew from the moment I met you."

"How! Nobody ever knows!"

She smiled cockily, "I have incredible gaydar. It's how I knew you were gay and it's why I know that Spencer's gay."

"So if you think Spencer's gay-."

"Know. I know Spencer's gay."

"How?"

"I just know her. She fucks boys, but eh, she doesn't like them around afterwards. She doesn't like when they're all in her room. I even got her to admit she was bisexual once but then Taylor kept egging her because she liked her so she got scared and said she was straight again."

"I can't compete with Taylor."

"She doesn't like her though!"

"Really?"

"Yeah, she like, genuinely feels bad. She's always talking about how she feels bad that she doesn't like Taylor but she just doesn't like her like that. I'm pretty sure she likes girlier girls. You could have a shot."

"Interesting.

"She's gay. She's definitely gay."

I nodded, satisfied with this fact, "I can go to sleep on a happy note."

"Try not to have a wet dream," Kelly grinned.

"No moaning," Sam warned.

My eyes widened, "Do I normally?"

"No. I'm just warning."

I went to bed and woke up to a day of kind of studying. I just wasn't feeling it. I ate some cereal in my room, not feeling like trudging up to the caf. I went to go to the lounge and wash my bowl, where the list was posted for our floor dinner tomorrow night. I grabbed the pen and signed my name and Sam's and then went to wash my dishes.

I was washing when Spencer and Tanisha came back from eating and passed the list reading it, "Hey Ashley's coming!" she squealed slightly as they were walking bye. I kind of internally smiled that it made her happy, considering I hadn't been to any of the floor dinners previously.

"Hey Sam, Abby texted me and wants to go to the library and study."

She groaned, "How pathetic. 9pm on a Saturday and we're going to the library."

"It's finals," I reasoned.

And then a sigh that gave, "Okay. Yeah, let's go in 20."

"All right cool," I walked out of the room to go get paper towel from the bathroom to take with me to the library. I planned on eating. Didn't want to make a mess.

I entered the bathroom the strangest site. I saw Tanisha and Spencer looking at themselves in the mirror, making sure they looked okay, like girls always do after they go to the bathroom and wash their hands, but they had mustaches drawn on their faces.

They both whipped around surprised and then Spencer smiled sloppily when she saw me, "Hey Ashley!"

"Hey...mustaches?"

"We're playing MUSTACHE kings cup," she announced proudly with another smile.

"And the difference would be?"

She shrugged, "We wear mustaches."

And I noticed the whole time Spencer would speak Tanisha would stay stood behind her completely silent. It was kind of weird so I felt inclined to ask, "Why isn't Tanisha speaking?"

"Oh! Well that's because she won the King's Cup so she can't speak now."

"Interesting."

That's when it got weird. In Spencer's complete drunkenness, her body slightly lurched forward but she kept herself. Her smile was so luminescent that I had to look down at it and I did and her eyes followed, staring at my lips while the shade of blue in her eyes darkened. I felt her body that had lurched sway slightly and her head seemed a little ahead of her body. Her eyes flicked back up to mine and back down to my lips which is when I started to stare at her lips, outlining them, tracing them, creating a mental image that I could capture and save forever of those perfectly beautiful luscious lips. This moment felt like it lasted so long though I'm sure it had to be 30 seconds at the most. I felt reality hitting me and the awkwardness set in as I stepped back and she did as well, regaining her drunken composure.

She gave me a really solid look and then accompanied it with a sideways smile and said, "Ashley, you're cute."

"Uhhh," I responded dumb founded still in awe of the awkward moment, watching her leaving, Tanisha in tow.

She looked back one last time as she reached the door and smiled at me even more slyly than the smile previously and added, "Yeah, you're REALLY cute. We're playing mustache kings cup in my room. You should join us."

"I don't have a mustache."

"Oh, we'll draw one on for you," and if I wasn't delusional I'd think her tone sounded a bit seductive.

"Actually, I just remembered I have a bunch of fake stick on ones in my room."

She smirked and raised an eye brow, "Well, there you."

I laughed and walked back to my room, not going and not telling anyone about the moment because I didn't really know how to handle it.

We were in the library and I couldn't concentrate because all I could think about was the fact that Spencer and I might have had a moment. But what if I imagined it. I got up to go to the bathroom to regroup myself and Sam got up to join since I was going and I had to tell someone. So I told her.

"Wow, Ash..."

"Do you think I'm imagining it?"

"No. Those moments are intense. You don't imagine those."

"Really?"

"Yeah," she breathed, obviously somewhere else distant, thinking.

"What?"

"I'm just thinking about this. I mean...wow. Wow."

"She was drunk."

"Drunken words are sober thoughts."

"Do you really believe that?"

She nodded. Let's ask Kelly and Abby.

I agreed and as we got back to the table we decided to fill them in and ask them.

"Whoa," Abby responded, "She wants you. I told you she wants you."

"What if I'm imagining it?"

"You don't imagine something like that."

"That's what I said!" Sam confirmed.

"They're right. You don't," Kelly agreed, "I told you she was gay as shit. Maybe she does like you."

"I've been saying this girl wants Ashley since September. She totally does," Abby informed Kelly.

My friends are pretty blunt, sometimes to the point of being mean, but they'd never lie to me. If they thought I was imagining it or it wasn't real they'd tell me. They believed me. They actually agreed with me. I didn't know what to do.

I studied all day Sunday because we had our floor dinner and in the evening we were all getting ready.

"These shoes or these?" Kelly asked us.

"The pumps, definitely," I responded pointing to the dark grey mary janes.

She nodded, "Yeah, probably best," and walked out.

"Sam, should I wear the purple top or the red one with this skirt?"

"That's a toughie...I'd probably have to go with red, but ask Kelly."

"Kelly!" I shouted, hoping she'd hear me since she was right next door. No luck so I knocked, "Kelly!" no answer.

I went to Spencer's room feeling like she'd be there and as I got there, Tanisha, Nicole, Spencer and Riley were all in her room and I was eye searching for Kelly.

I was getting frustrated because nobody could hear me since so much talking was going on and nobody was paying attention and I just wanted to find Kelly, "Spencer is- ugh is- is Kelly here?" no answer so I nudged my way slightly in, "Kelly? Kelly?" I kind of started to whine irritatedly, "Kel- ugh Kellllly? I just want to ask you something," I kind of called out in a rather whiney voice.

Spencer eyeing me the whole time and mouthed quietly to me, "You're cute," and kind of looked away as she said it, the first time I'd ever seen any form of embarrassment or blatant shyness of the sort on her face. I smiled at that as Kelly popped up as well and headed with me back to our room, continuing to get ready for the floor dinner.


	6. Save Your Secrets

**This is the longest chapter so far, but sorry the average length of the chapters isn't very long. I don't want to really stretch out material that isn't there. Anyway, thanks for all the reviews so far and keep them coming. Enjoy :)**

I walked up to the first floor with Sam, meeting everyone for the floor dinner. Nothing too fancy. I left most of my dresses and skirts and such at home because I thought it'd be so freezing up here and that I'd never be able to wear them. I left most of my flats and heels home too; needless to say I had to dabble with Sam's stuff. We emerged, Sam curled her hair, she looked good. I wore heels, which I never wore here because of the weather not really calling for it, nice jeans and one of my nice tops, that I've worn many times before. I kind of always liked to look classy, but not as much as Spencer.

She turned around at the noise of heels coming and her eyes opened a little wider and she smiled, "Damn girl, you look hot," her eyes scanned me finding my heels that elongated my already long legs that I knew she admired because she'd stare at them every chance she got.

I blushed. I always turn pink when I get compliments, "Thanks."

Our whole floor walked to the bus loop, with our RA and went to the floor dinner. I didn't talk to her once the whole time because she wasn't at my table. But I'd occasionally glance back in the most casual manner until Sam smacked me on the shoulder.

"What?"

"Stop staring. It's rude."

"Sorry..."

"Why so gloomy, bud?"

"I thought I'd get to sit with her."

She stifled a laugh, "You really think her minions would let anyone get near her?"

It was true. Spencer had this personality that people kind of just gravitated towards, that people just wanted to follow. Like a Regina George but not a bitch. In no time, Tanisha, Nicole and Riley had become her personal assistants, getting her whatever she wanted, doing what she wanted, even taking on some of her traits. They adored her. Not in the way I adored her, but they did.

I looked back at Sam, "No."

She frowned slightly, "Maybe you should let her go."

"She totally wants me."

"Maybe she's not ready, Ash."

I turned to glance at her casually again, "Maybe not."

The next night was Monday, and you wouldn't guess what I was doing again. Studying. But, no. Not Tanisha and Nicole and Riley and Spencer. They were going cosmic bowling. I don't even know where the nearest bowling alley is, and they're dressing up as country people. No doubt one of Spencer's ideas. They were also stoned.

And somehow, Sam and I got into a conversation about my pipe, Alfred. It's this little pipe I bought in September at this night market, made out of Walnuts. It looks like a little lawn gnome, slightly freaky but kind of adorable. He even had googly eyes. You smoke out of his hat, and he's holding this bowl and that's where you put the herb. A lot of people didn't like him because he scared them.

Not Abby. Abby thought he was the most adorable thing in the world. He was our child, and we became highly offended when anyone didn't like Alfred.

"Yeah, so Kelly says she doesn't like Alfred," Sam let out as she was reading over her Psychology text book.

"What?"

"Go back to studying."

"I need to ask her."

I knew she'd be in Nicole's room because Nicole shared a room with Brianna, another good friend of ours and Kelly and Bri were like best friends. Kelly was always there.

I walked over to their room and the door was open, "Kelly!"

"Yes?"

I walked in to confront her, "Is it true you don't like Alfred?"

"He's scary."

"What! That's just! That's! That's so!" I was having trouble making words. One of my best friends didn't like Alfred.

Nicole turned to me, stoned, "Who's Alfred?"

I started to explain, and when I explain about things that I like I tend to get excited. Heavy hand movements, dramatic facial expressions, change in pitch of voice.

"And he looks like a gnome! With little googly eyes!"

I didn't realize Spencer had come up beside me, no doubt to talk to Nicole.

"Whoa..." she responded.

"And he's so cute cause he's got this little blue floppy hat that's not really floppy but it's made to look floppy and you smoke out of the tip and he holds his little bowl all cupped in the crook of his arm and he's got a big nose," I let out all in one breath.

Spencer turned to me, eyes heavily squinted, definitely stoning and put her hand on my shoulder, "You're so cute."

I looked up at her and smiled bashfully, "I'll show you."

I ran back to my room, grabbed Alfred and came back, showing Nicole.

"He is pretty cute," she agreed.

"Thank you!"

Spencer giggled, probably at my enthusiasm. Half the things I did seemed to make her laugh for one reason or another. And she always had this look on her face like I amused the fuck out of her.

* * *

><p>So Sam and I had just taken our final for Intro to Writing and I was pissed because I got a D on my final term paper. I did everything that stupid bitch asked. I did every revision she advised, she as in my professor and she told me it was good. A D. Fuck you. I texted Kelly. I needed to smoke.<p>

She kept being weird asking where I was and not telling me where I was, so when I finally got back to to our floor, I shouted, "Kelly!"

Spencer's door opened up and as I walked by she grabbed me, "You're coming in here."

"What?"

Sam came in too and we both sat on Spencer's bed.

"Just smoke," she handed me the tube from her vaporizer.

I was ranting about how bad my Writing grade was that after I took my first hit, I handed the tube to Spencer who I thought was ready to grab it and let it go, allowing it to swing against the bed frame and shattering the mouth piece.

Kelly's eyes bulged, "You broke it!"

"I did?" my eyes started to get watery, "I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry. I didn't mean to break it."

"Dawg it's okay," Spencer responded, "I was going to go to downtown to get a new hose anyway. This one's mad kinked. Now we just have to go tonight."

"But I broke it," I frowned, looking down at the glass.

She sat beside me putting her arm around my shoulder, "It's okay. Don't even trip."

"I'll pay for your new one."

"No."

"Yeah. How much are they? 10 bucks?"

"Ashley, you're not giving me a cent."

"Five bucks."

"Ashley stop."

"I'll give you money for it, I swear."

She shook her head and rolled her eyes, "Stop. We're going to get a new one."

I got up to leave and she grabbed my arm, "You're coming too."

"I am?"

She grinned her slightly naughty way, "This is your way of paying me back."

I cocked an eye brow, "By going?"

"She's going with us?" Kelly asked.

"Yep. She has to," she turned to Sam, "You want to come too?"

Sam looked around finding a reason not to go I'm sure. She wasn't exactly thrilled about Spencer, "Sure."

Abby had texted me what we were doing and I told her about going to downtown.

**Can I come? I mean if that's okay...**

**Of course. Get yer ass over here cause we're leaving in five.**

I went to go change into something better and I came back to Spencer's door, who looked up at me from her desk chair, "I like your shirt."

It was my same striped one. The blue and green and grey one that she liked in the beginning of the year. She always did this. She'd always compliment something and then compliment it again like she'd never seen it before. Normally I never took her compliments well. My friends would get mad so as the compliment left her mouth, I could see Kelly glaring at me out of the corner of my eye.

"Thank you," I said nicely, which received a satisfied smile and nod from Kelly. I breathed out the breath I didn't know I was holding, reassured.

It was fun. All of us, Spencer, Kelly, Abby, Sam and me had an adventure. We went to a smokeshop so she could buy a new hose and she bought a pipe for her friend as well. We went to this really good food place and then we smoked on the steps of the museum.

And for some reason every time we were on the bus we always ended up sat next to each other and we started talking.

"Yeah, people think I'm a bitch when they first meet me because I'm kind of shy," she continued.

"Yeah, I thought you didn't like me," I added.

"Yeah! I'm just not good at the beginning parts."

"Some people aren't."

"Plus, I don't know. I just got this attitude in my head that if I act like I'm really cool, maybe I'll actually attract the people who are really cool."

I frowned, "What about the people who were intimidated by the fact that you were so cool?"

She shrugged, "Confidence attracts confidence."

I gave, "I guess so."

We all got off the bus walking back and Spencer and I continued talking, "You're a really passionate speaker."

She turned to look at me with a kind of crooked smile, "I know. I get really into what I'm talking about."

"That's good though."

"See, my ex boyfriend always did poetry slams and stuff so he was really into that and I just got into that," and she went on about that for I want to say 3 minutes, but I was stoned so give or take a minute or so.

I started to giggle and I tried to suppress it but it was proving to be difficult and she turned to look at me, "What?"

"Nothing. You just really do like to talk, huh?"

I couldn't see if she was embarrassed because it was dark but she kind of smiled, "I'm sorry I'm talking too much."

"No! I love it."

* * *

><p>"Spencer said she really liked hanging out with you guys," Kelly informed me the next day.<p>

"Yeah?"

She nodded.

"That's cool. Glad she liked us."

She nodded again and I got the feeling she knew something that I didn't know but I wasn't going to push it because Kelly got mad when I asked about Spencer too much.

I went on facebook that night to see that I had a wall post from none other.

It said:

"have you listened to the most recent episode of this american life? it is uh-mazing. ira glass 333. you have to listen, you'll love it."

And I found it cute that she remembered that I liked This American Life and all things NPR. I did kind of flip shit when I found out it was her homepage. And this girl was doing things to me that I needed time to sit on and just in time for winter break.

"You're leaving?" five days later.

"Yup!" I grabbed my suite case, "Taxi's waiting for me," I smiled.

"Aw. Have fun! Enjoy L.A.!" she smiled embracing me in a big hug, "Enjoy your Christmas!"

"I shall,"I smiled.

She smiled back, "Bye Ashley! See you next year."


	7. Cupid's Victim

I arrived at 1am back to school on a Sunday night, so I didn't really get to see anybody as I was coming in. I briefly caught up with Sam and then we went to bed because I had class at 8am the next day. I was going to need a lot of coffee.

I was walking down the hall midday when I ran into none other than Spencer.

"You're back!" she smiled happily and embraced me in a friendly hug.

I hated hugs. I was never good at them. They always felt awkward to me- when to let go, how tight to hold on, where to place my hands. But, every hug with Spencer felt just right, and yet I hated them at the same time because I never wanted to let go and she always did.

"How was home?" she asked.

I shrugged, "It was nice. But, I missed this," I sighed surveying the floor around us.

She nodded knowingly, "I get you."

"How was being home?"

"I liked it a lot, but I missed all my people here."

"Can't get enough of us, eh?" I nudged and winked.

"Of course. I just die without you guys."

I smiled probably way too big but it felt nice to have normal interaction with Spencer where I wasn't stuttering and making a fool out of myself, "You love us!" I called out walking back to my room.

And it was like we finally broke the ice and hit normalcy.

Except this weekend. The first weekend of the term was always really relaxed so of course Spencer was having another party in her room. We went out to our own party to except it was kind of lame, so we came back at 1am to have pizza.

I walked into the bathroom, washing my hands and saw Spencer slam in in the mirror. I turned around, startled, and her eyes flickered up at me and she headed towards the stall. Tanisha followed en suite and sighed.

"Is she okay?" I asked, trying to hide my worry.

"Yeah," she rolled her eyes, "She's just really hammered."

I'd never seen Spencer this hammered. She usually was the one always in control. No matter how much alcohol she took in she could always handle it.

"Spencer you okay?" Tanisha called to one of the stalls.

"Yeah!"

"I'll be in your room if you need anything," she walked out.

I headed over to the stall and banged on the door, "Spencer are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah! I'm totally fine!"

"Spencer let me in."

"Noooo. It'sss okay," she slurred.

"I'm serious, Spencer. Let me in. Let me help you."

"I'll be fiiiine Asssshley."

"You're sick."

"Esssokay though. This happensss sometimesss. I drank a littttttle bit too much and now I have to puke and then I'll feel all nice and better."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! But I really really appreciate that you care. I like it. I do."

I stood there awkwardly, not sure whether to leave the bathroom or stay, but I heard a flush and then appeared Spencer as she went to go wash her hands.

I put my arm around her, "You okay?" she put her arms around me in a hug so I put my other arm around her to complete the hug, "I just want you to be okay."

"Mmmm I like your hugs."

She let go and her body swayed back a little bit in her drunken state, "Be safe."

"I'm going to go vap."

"Spencer..."

"Ashley, it's okay cause it's just vaping and it's not puking or drinking."

I rolled my eyes, "Okay."

She looked at me once more before leaving, "You look really pretty!" and then the bathroom door shut.

I walked by Spencer's room the next day to see the door open so I kind of invited myself in like I always do.

"Hey."

She turned around to look up at me and smiled like she always did, "Hey there."

"How you feelin'?"

She grinned knowingly. So her memory hadn't left her, "I'm fine."

"Are you sure? No nausea? No headaches?"

She rolled her eyes with a smile, "Nope."

"I hope I wasn't being annoying. I was just like...I don't know maybe a little slightly bit worried."

She laughed, "I don't mind. I appreciate it. It's happened to me before."

"Okay cause I always check up on my patients the next morning so I just had to see how you were feeling."

"Well, thank you doctor. I will definitely be okay."

* * *

><p>Spencer and I's friendship seemed to maintain it's level of normalcy. She went on a slight hiatus and kind of ignored me for two weeks. I wasn't sure what I did to bother her, to which I found out she had an off again on again boyfriend back home who she wasn't committed to. I wasn't sure if that was the reason.<p>

And then one day she stepped back into my life, literally, as I was digging to find something under my desk I heard a knock, except my door was open so they must have been knocking on the door frame.

I rushed to get up and slammed my head, "Sorry...I didn't mean to scare you."

I heard Spencer's voice and I smiled to myself because she couldn't see me under my desk. I stood up, "Hey."

"I just wanted to know if I could borrow a lighter. Want to light some incense. People always steal my lighters."

"Yeah, definitely," I grabbed one of my lighters sticking my hand out to her and walking toward the doorway where she stayed stood, looking mildly timid.

She began to walk into my room sticking her incense out, "Just light it here."

I lit it and we were silent while we watched it ember and then she waved it to blow the flame out, "Mmm, Jasmine."

"So, you're wanting to go to Coachella, right?"

"Right."

"I was looking at the lineup and...god, Ash, it just looks so good. I can't even take it."

She called me Ash and I smiled which I think she noticed but didn't respond to.

"I want to go too...but it's during finals."

"Well what if we don't have finals bordering those dates?" the cogs clearly turning in her head.

"Then I'd definitely be down."

She nodded, "You and I should go."

"Yes!" I looked down and we were both standing near my bed, her hand was rubbing my comforter, "Sorry. I eat in my bed there might be crumbs."

"Oh it's not a problem. I find shake in my bed all the time."

"My friend Sasha and I, she's my best friend back at home, we always used to smoke in her room on her bed, and you'd wake up sometimes with like a nug next your head and it was like, 'Hello beautiful,' it made me so happy."

She laughed. Like a loud, thorough bellowing of laughter, "That's priceless."

"We all deserve to wake up to a little nug in the morning you know?"

She nodded still laughing, "I couldn't agree more."

The proximity of our bodies was way too close for comfort and I think she sensed that so I broke the silence, "I need your opinion on something."

"Okay."

"See, it's my friend's birthday, and she loves smarties. So I was thinking of getting her 19 boxes of smarties since it's her 19th birthday. Would that be ridiculous?"

"No. I'd love it if somebody did that for me. The stupidest things are the best gifts."

I smiled at her appreciation, "Good. Thanks."

She was still holding her incense and we both looked down at it and she laughed as another bit of ash dropped to the floor, "Sorry."

"Your whole incense is almost gone."

She smiled, "That's okay. Now your room can smell like Jasmine."

"I have Jasmine incense too."

"I like to believe I'm the cool person who started the whole incense lighting craze on this floor."

"Hey. I've been lighting incense long before I came to University."

"Agh. Couldn't just let me have that could you?"

I shook my head jokingly, "Sorry." we looked down again at all the ash on my floor and I rubbed it into the carpet with my foot, "Wouldn't be the first time..."

"Well, as long as I'm not ruining your stellar carpets..."

"I assure you these carpets were ruined long before you entered the room."

Her eyes grinned playfully, "Glad to hear it," and she left the room which was good because I had class in twenty.


End file.
